But guess what: it happens to literally all of us (aka: you’re not alone and it’s totally normal). You can bounce back, start again, make a new plan, still get that goal done.
— Get curious
First, allow yourself time to feel disappointed, discouraged, frustrated or [insert uncomfortable feeling here]. You are human after all. Once you’ve processed your feelings, and released that energy….
Then get curious.
- What didn’t go as planned? Why not?
- How did this goal not get met? How did it not get accomplished?
- What obstacles and challenges came up?
- What can be done in future to change, correct, overcome or avoid this?
- Did I ask for and accept the help, and whatever else, I needed in order to reach this goal?
- What am I willing to give up, or let go of, to make sure this goal becomes a reality?
As long as you can take something away from the experience, it’s never wasted time or a reason for disappointment. Learn the lesson it was meant to teach you so you can move forward.
#truthbomb: there’s always a solution, even if you can’t see it right away.
— Connect to your vision
Look back at your big picture vision to make sure your goals are still aligned with it.
It’s so important to define where we want our biz, lives and us to be in the long term, so we can filter our daily decisions through it. Otherwise, we may find ourselves working busily on random things that bring no meaning to our lives. And 1, 5 or 10 years from now we think “Why haven’t I accomplished anything meaningful in all this time??”
- Why am I working towards this goal? If you don’t have an answer (that you like, or at all), the goal needs to be reassessed.
- Do you still feel passionate, inspired and motivated by the goal? Is it still important and meaningful to you?
- Or does it just not feel right anymore? If not, why not? And why haven’t you let it go already?
— Be flexible
Sometimes goals, and our plans to achieve them, turn out to be more challenging and/or time consuming than we anticipated.
It’s not possible for us to predict the future and how things will turn out, so sometimes you’ve just gotta pivot and change things up. That’s totally OK – it’s all part of the journey!
Give yourself permission to change, adjust, try something different. Be open to new ideas and ways of doing things. How can you adjust your schedule, to-do list, plans, expectations? What can or needs to change? Brainstorm #alltheideas, no matter how silly you might think they are right now (once you see a bunch of ideas on paper, even more will come to you when you least expect it).
Try setting a new version of your goal, for a very short amount of time, to see how it goes. Test things out and take action.
— Take action
Did you actually take action on your goal? Any action? Have you taken even one small step yet? Or done nothing? It’s time to get real honest with yo’self.
Base your goals off what you know you can accomplish, instead of trying to do something vastly out of your reach. Did you break down that goal enough, into small doable actions?
We often give up or fail because we want instant gratification (aka: results!) Break the goal down so you can consistently see (and celebrate) your progress. Which one of those small actions can you focus on today? Do it.
As long as you’ve shown up and taken steps to reach your goal, you’ve already succeeded.
— Address mindset
Check in with yourself about your reactions, tendencies and habits when you don’t happen to meet a goal.
Is there anything you need to let go of (ie: limiting beliefs, outdated stories about how things are, frustrations) or forgive yourself for (ie: old habits, negative self-talk, not being prepared for unforeseen circumstances)?
What limiting stories come up for you? Maybe you’ve tried something similar in the past, and it didn’t go as expected, or flat out failed…is there a part of you saying it’s not possible? That you can’t do the thing? Have a hard and honest look at your thoughts.
If you took at least some action, but aren’t happy with the result:
- Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to achieve your goals, and to do it in a certain way. Pressure can make goals harder to reach, because it just adds a stressful energy to the mix. It shouldn’t feel like a struggle – it should mostly feel inspiring and motivating.
- Let go of your expectation of how things “should” turn out. Challenge your beliefs about how things need to be, and what needs to happen. Does it really need to be that way?
- Remember that you don’t need to know all the how’s right now. All you need to know is the next step.
- Consider that maybe it’s not as big a deal as you think…you still did something (way to go!), just not what was expected (so what?)
If you didn’t take any action:
- Are you making excuses? Avoiding something? Afraid of something? Of success (ie: people being jealous or not being a part of your life anymore), rejection (ie: someone not liking what you put out there) or judgement (ie: everyone saying how you “should” have done it)?
- Consider how any of these things may have impacted your ability to take action on your goal.
Other things to consider:
– Maybe you’re working on too many goals. Dream big, and aspire to everything you want, but you can only work on so much at any given time.
– It could be a sign that you need to start delegating. If you’re not seeing the growth you want in your biz, are caught up in the details, and/or spending tons of time figuring out and working on things that aren’t your area of expertise, delegate that shiz. It’s going to free up your time to work in your zone of genius and achieve those goals!
– What kind of people do you share your goals with? Make sure that the people you share and surround yourself with are encouraging, supportive, kind and looking out for your best interest. Who we spend time with matters, and can effect our own beliefs and mindset. Get rid of the Negative Nellie’s, and the other sad sacks, so you can find/choose a community that will lift you up.